Cold And Windy in Caballo

Having trouble getting motivated in my small space.

The wind swept my carpets clean and blew my umbrella over.

I can’t wait for Spring.

I’m waiting for my Colorado man who will be coming soon and plans to live right here in my RV Park. Will it be awkward? I don’t think so but I suppose it could be only if we expect too much too fast. It will be nice to get out and do stuff together, did I tell you he sent flowers on Valentine’s Day and a card for my birthday? Very attentive and a sweet man, I hope we feel a mutual attraction that we both feel and enjoy, a cuddle would be nice. I’ve never kissed anyone while I have my denture, will that be awkward? Any advice? I don’t know if he has dentures. Can two denture -d mouths comfortably kiss? Getting ahead of myself!

And what if we just don’t like each other after all, what if we don’t like each other’s scent or how we chew our food or dress or cook. Or we just are not compatible Somehow I don’t think it will be a problem because we can just go on being ourselves living close by as friends or moving on and go back to our lists of faces in hopes of finding that someone to fill that empty space around us. I know he is interested in travel and wasn’t able to get the vehicle he planned to get so travel may not be a priority for now I guess we’ll figure it out, I’ll need to keep GG, she is my security, my quiet space, my retreat if or when needed.

Meanwhile I’ve stocked up my pantry bought plenty fruits and veggies I’ll look for recipes and organize my spaces while I wait to meet this new person in my life, at the very least he’ll be a friend at most he’ll be a lover, what more could an old lady want?

Is it a Conundrum?

When you aren’t sure of the proper response? When you have to make choices you should not have to make? What is the kindest response? Or should you just let it go and see what happens?

Yup, its the dating thing, with responses from more than one man. One I almost know, one I’d like to know more and one close enough to get to know. So what to do? Maybe doing nothing is the answer for now. Sit back and let whatever happens for the best, we’re all in the same condition of not knowing who and where our future rests.

Flowers & cards for Valentines day shows a pretty strong interest from one and I know he will arrive one day as he wants to move out of the cold and thinks Caballo NM might be where he wants to live at least part-time. He may be moving a bit too fast for me.

But time is moving in a quick-step and tomorrow I’ll be 79. I’m pretty contented as I am, not even sure I need change or am able to let another person into my life, I guess I’ll find out, maybe.

a conundrum is a situation where there is no clear right answer or no good solution.

Back to painting after a lapse

I haven’t felt like painting for awhile, probably because the studio feels cold even though I can turn on the heat. It feels cold that’s not a physical cold more of a psychological cold, difficult to get started because the days are cold and dreary, no plants or flowers nothing but a plant of kale in the garden., But my plants inside the RV look like they will survive the winter and even flourish so I’ll have a head start when Spring finally makes her way to Caballo.

Today I went to pick up a few essentials at Walmart and the seeds are in!,!! When I checked out the woman says “ looks like you’ll have a beautiful garden ,” I bought too many seeds, mostly flowers because I want lots of flowers. Vegetables I’ll buy the plants when they arrive. Last years garden was pretty good for veggies not so good for flowers because of the heat. I need to devise a system of afternoon shade for them this year. Waiting for the ground to not freeze so I can plant. Winter is my least favorite month living in an RV, it gets hard to find what to do in this small space, too easy to do nothing.

I’m still on that dating app, interesting but confusing because of distances. I can’t meet someone for coffee because they are mostly from a different state or more than 60 miles away, few are from NM.

Most of the men are from Arizona or Colorado, a good distance away and they are as old as I am and less likely to travel this far to meet someone they don’t know, same for me.

But there is one man willing to do that and he is coming next week, not only to see me but because he wants to get out of the cold and snow and thinks he’d like to move here. And he’ll be here for my birthday. I’m feeling a little pressure, not sure how this will go.

Also I haven’t met or conversed any other men and there about 60 more men on my page some of whom I might like to meet or correspond with, It feels awkward, because one man takes up my time and assumes too much. He is a very nice man, I think, but I don’t know and there are a lot of men who are not really nice and my daughter says I’m too trusting. I can’t be otherwise, life is too short.